I'm Sorry
My beautiful miracle!
My precious flower,
I am so very sorry...
for the silence that kept me from getting help.
for the shame I felt every time I asked for a place to get away from him,
and was denied pretentiously by my family and friends.
for not making a better choice of a husband to be your father.
for not preparing myself to be more self sufficient,
so that I did not need to depend upon him for support.
for trying to work it out with him instead of seeing,
it for what it was from the beginning.
for not having the strength or courage to walk away
when there was still time to save you.
for the chain of abuse that I experienced as a child
and was unable to break as an adult.
for the fear I felt about living in extreme poverty with you starving
to death with me or dying of the elements
that I could not protect you from.
for all the people in our lives, out of fear,
that would not provide a safe haven
for us no matter how badly we were beaten.
for all the summer days you will never see.
for all the years learning in school you will never know.
for every loving moment I had planned to give to you
that you will never receive.
Most of all, I am sorry that I will not get the chance now to love
and take care of you, my beautiful miracle, my precious flower.
Please forgive me.
Love Always and Forever,
Mommy
"I'll like you for always,
I'll love you forever,
as long as I'm living
my baby you'll be!"
​
I am sorry for every woman, child and yes man, I was unable to help or reach before it was too late to save them in the name of love. © Jul 2010